Easterrific!

Depression

ruzella — Thu, 06 Jan 2011 03:10:03 +0000

My heart aches now. Thinking that you will be leaving in a few hours. Realizing that last night was the last night that I will be spending with you this week. I know that this is not the end but I don’t know why I feel so depressed and lonely thinking about it. The last two weeks was a blast. Probably the two happiest weekends of my life. After nine years of being with you, I got so used to it that spending a day away from you is so hard. Your two weeks visit reminded me of how much time we spend together that I didn’t even want to step out of the room today and spend the rest of the few hours away from you. Just thinking that you will be leaving today, makes me cry and hope that you would just stay a bit longer.

The next three weeks will be the longest three weeks of my life again. I just have to survive these 3 coming weeks without you. My only wish right now is that you could just stay with me here. By my side. For good.

A dream…

ruzella — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 12:48:21 +0000

Yesterday, an officemate of mine asked me if I had seen the Tuesday Vargas wedding on TV. Since I was not able to catch that one, I told her no and started browsing the net for videos of the said wedding. It’s a good thing there were uploaded videos that were viewable here in our office, since our IT department had been monitoring everything and blocking every site possible. And so I watched the said video and true enough, I was so moved, I was almost in tears. Being in a relationship for 8 years, I have always dreamt of having the perfect wedding with him. Since I love the beach so much, I have always fantasized that my wedding would be a on a beach. Like the wedding video that I have just watched, I have always imagined that we would be exchanging our own vows along the shores of a fine beach. Every girl has her own dream wedding and this was my dream. I was never given a big party in my life. I did not even have a grand debut. I’m not a lavish person but I feel that I deserve something more for this day. But come what may, however this special day would turn out, I sure hope that I would be exchanging my marriage vows with you. =)

Like Christmas

ruzella — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 17:28:39 +0000

My birthday was just like Christmas. I got so many gifts!!! Both tangible and intangible. I got virtual gifts, cakes and greeting cards in facebook. From that very special person in my life, I got a singlet, a perfume and a new pair of Converse shoes!!! He even surprised me with a long stemmed rose and a cake the night before (Hehehe… It only shows that he reads my blogs). To you, thanks so much for making all my wishes come true this Christmas day.. este Birthday pala.. Hehehe… From my officemates, I received 2 snickers from James (by request… Hehehehe), fit and right fruit snack from Louie (by request din.. hehehe) and an IPOD armband from my batchmates!!! =)

Thank you all for making me feel blessed and happy on my birthday. =)

Stuck

ruzella — Wed, 31 Mar 2010 18:44:47 +0000

Its quarter to 3 in the morning and I’m still stuck here in the office. It’s this time of the year again. Time for sleepless nights, cramming, unhealthy diet, unpaid overtimes and pimples. My mind felt numb now. Really needed to get some sleep. Got to go home. Now.

44 days to go…

ruzella — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 03:32:54 +0000

Yup.. 44 days to go til I turn 26… Well I guess I can say that I have already lived a quarter of my life now (supposing I’d stay alive for my 100th bday.. hehehe..).

Im posting this blog just so people would have ideas on what I really wanted for my birthday (hahaha.. as if there are people reading this.. what I really meant with “people’ is you..=p).. Well anyways, I just wanted to voice this out. I’ve already had a share of unwanted birthdays, I just wanted to start the next quarter of my life on a different note.. Hehehe..

I want a cake. Since it’s my birthday, I want to have a birthday cake. The first birthday cake I had was when I celebrated my 7th birthday. The next one came 11 years after, during my debut(it was just a very simple cake). The last was during my 19th bday (I think..). It was my favorite cake from red ribbon and was given by my most favorite person on earth (hehehe..). I think a cake is not so much to ask..=p

I want a long stemmed white/peach rose for my birthday. It’s been a long time since you gave me one. I may not be a fan of flowers, but it feels good to receive flowers sometimes, especially on occasions like these. But I don’t want a bouquet. I just want one long stemmed rose..=p

Lastly, I want a SURPRISE gift from you. Since it’s a surprise, I don’t want to know in advance or I don’t want you asking for my approval or if this thing or that thing would be ok as a gift. I just wanted to be surprsied. That’s all.

Well I guess everything I’ve asked for is not so much to ask. Can’t wait.. Hehehe..=p

Run…

ruzella — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 06:57:25 +0000

I’m running now, literally.

I don’t know what really drove me into the sport. Maybe because he also got into it (and saw how much weight he lost) or maybe because I just wanted to tone my muscles (or so that my legs would somehow lose a few inches of cellulites.. hahaha). Or maybe because I just wanted to have a more active lifestyle now. I used to run fast when I was in high school but i lost all my agility and speed when I went to college because I concentrated on studying. Well, this is the right time to awaken the athlete in me again (hahaha..=p). Just bought my running shoes last night, after spending money on sports bra and running shorts last week. Whew! Thought this sport is not that expensive. I thought wrong. I also joined the first ever running team of the Company. It felt good to be finally sweating again. Well, good luck for me. I hope I really lose those inches of cellulite.. Hahaha..=p

Randomness

ruzella — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 06:33:38 +0000

Fun times

I’m missing you right now.

Although, I was just with you last night, it seemed that time is always not enough. This is just one of the moments that I wish you are right here beside me just so I can give you a big hug.

I was working and I got stuck until I started to flip for pictures of us in my laptop (Ialways do this to make me relax and take my mind off things for a while..=p). .. I missed these times. Hope we could go out again like this and enjoy the sun. hope we could just stay this way forever.Just a wishful thinking.

A big hug for you and I love you.=)

Lost

ruzella — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 03:31:40 +0000

I don’t know where to go.

I’m here at a point where I have been thinking and thinking, where should I actually be? This year is my ultimatum for myself to work abroad. I wanted to go abroad, to work there. For me, this is my express ticket to having the life I wanted for my family. As of now, I have been actively seeking for THAT job abroad but I always end up a failure, with no employer giving me calls. I’m losing hope. I’m scared. What if I don’t get what I want? What now? I wanted to stick with my plans.: To work abroad for one year and then get married when I get back. But what if evrything would not go as planned? Should I just get married and settle for a job here in the Philippines? Would that make me happy? At this point, i really don’ know where to go, what to do…

ruzella — Fri, 08 Jan 2010 02:08:07 +0000

I promised myself I’ll try to put an entry here everyday. So here it is.. another entry…
I tried composing something yesterday but I don’t know, when I tried to click the “Publish” button, it disappeared… Oh well. I won’t be able to compose that one again. It just won’t come out the same way…I think…

Last night I finished reading the 4th book of the Tiwlight Saga, Breaking Dawn. I’m not really a fan of the book until after I’ve watched the second movie, New Moon. After seing Jacob’s body (hahaha), I got interested in reading the book. Anyways, it’s been fun and very interesting. I’ve always been a bookworm in my elementary and high school days. If I found a pocket book that really caught my interest, I will not stop reading it. I am a fan of love stories, well I think most girls are. Maybe that’s why I was so drawn to the Twilight Saga series. I was really so into the Edward-Bella-Jacob love story. In New Moon, I though I was already fixed with the Jacob-Bella love team but finishing the series, I thiink I still favor the Edward-Bella tandem. I don’t know, nothing would really compare to how Edward loved Bella. I think every girl fantasizes for them to have their own “Edwards” in their lives…=)

Long time..

ruzella — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 13:20:00 +0000

Haven’t really written anything in a while now. Everytime I wanted to write something or an idea pops in my mind, I would always not have my laptop with me. I try to commit whatever I have tried to compose in my mind, but when I start to write them, it always seemed off. There are even times that I would blabber on and on and end up not finishing what I have started. I envy those bloggers who just fluently write everything they wanted to write and always ends up finishing what they have written in a perfect way. Well, maybe with right timing and the inspiration, I might be able to that someday too..